Death and zen thinking

So yesterday at 3 pm pacific time my grandmother passed away. This was my step fathers mother. We knew it was coming but I didnt realize this soon. When I found out I told my boss I was leaving work. I could not just sit there and think about it in that office. So I went home and decided to go to the indoor snowboard park that is maybe 45 min from my apartment. I havent been on a board in 2 years and it showed but I could really clear my mind. Everything just melted away. I was truly at peace. I was in a freezing room with a bunch of people I didnt know that could not speak english. It was great! I took the train home and on the way I had a horrible thought. Some day we will all be dead and the world will go on without us. I will be in the ground and be nothing. Just forgotten by everyone except those closest to me. It really scared me. Maybe other people think this way but I dont know. I was close to having a full blown panic attack right there on the train. I put some music on and calmed down but it still lingers with me hours later. I gotta go to the store now and cook some dinner. Hope all is well with everyone. Rap at you later.